I don’t know how it happened, but Halloween is only a few days away! And already my newsfeed has been flooded with pictures of Halloween parties and girls showing off their, more or less, “creative” costumes from this past weekend. Now let me be the first to admit to having a few ratchet years of Halloween getups myself. For instance, my first year of college I was a keg. Yep, a keg! Me and my friends qualified a good keg ensemble as wrapping ourselves up in duck-tape and writing keg across our chest, just in case people didn’t get it. I mean, I’m just happy there are no existing pictures from that unfortunate night. Since I have been that girl, I think I have the right to comment on my current feelings about this holiday.
Growing up, and even through high school, Halloween was my favorite holiday out of the year. First, I’m obsessed with scary movies, and the majority of Halloween movies I consider to be classics. Who can disagree that Hocus Pocus never gets old? There is also the, Nightmare Before Christmas, The Addams Family, Casper, Beetlejuice, and the Disney Channel’s Halloweentown (the original of course). Then, being able to dress up and be whoever or whatever you wanted was the best part, for me at least. My most memorable costume was when I was the pink power ranger. I had the whole outfit from head to toe. My gloves even came equipped with sound effects, which I had worn out by the end of the night. Finally, the guarantee of a having a full bag of free candy by the end of the night, which would last for weeks after, is awesome. I wish I could still go trick-or-treating without it being completely inappropriate and creepy.
As you get older Halloween begins to have a different purpose besides getting free candy and dressing up. Eventually, all you can really expect from this holiday, as you reach a certain age, is binge drinking and sexy (fill in the blank) costumes. Apparently, anything can be morphed into a sexy costume, such as sexy raccoon or sexy cab driver. In what world have you ever met a sexy cabbie? Let's not forget about all the picture poses that girls practice to match their outfits.
It’s ridiculous, but I get it. The movie Mean Girls explained it the best, “Halloween is the one day a year when a girl can dress up like a total slut and no other girls can say anything else about it.” All girls like to be able to show off their stuff, and on this day you don’t have to feel self-conscious, since everyone will be running around half naked in public anyway. I just wish girls would use a little more imagination or creativity because there are only so many sexy bubble bees I will tolerate in one night.
I guess, I am officially a grandma, because I have lost all enjoyment when it comes to going out for Halloween. I don’t think it’s that much fun to be at a dirty bar barley wearing anything. If you’re not in the bar you’re waiting in line freezing your little tush off for way too long. Once you do get in you realize the cover charge is double what it is normally only to drink at the same place you go every other weekend for free. Typically, one of your girlfriends either ends up crying, belligerent, or arguing with their boyfriend all night. After spending two paychecks on your costume, and then dishing out even more money on drinks so you can tolerate the rest of the night, it all becomes a little overrated. That’s just me though.